Sex > Valium (Body Language)

Posted: September 29, 2012 in Attraction, dating, Seduction

According to experts, sex is about 10 times more effective as a tranquillizer than Valium. 

What the hell does this have to do with anything you ask?  If you’ve read ANY of my material, you know that I preach the mantra “Those who have much will receive more.”  This is true.  It’s a conundrum but it’s pure fact.  Ok, how the hell does this relate to you and your dating life?  Allow me to explain, good sir.

How do you act when you have had a lot of sex during a week (yes, one woman still counts).  How do you act when you are satisfied with your dating life?  Hopefully you have experienced this state at least a little bit because here is the humdinger.  This is when you are most likely to score another girl.  Why you ask?  Because evolution has programmed women to want what other women want.  Women want the man that already has women.  Simple as that.

  In an experiment, a plastic male duck was placed in an open field during mating season.  Just by himself.  Chillin’.  Needless to say, our plastic friend was not very successful with the ladies.  Then that same duck was paired up with another female plastic duck and guess what happened?  …no really, you have to guess.  Bingo!  He was VERY successful.  Female ducks from all around strived to find his plastic little… okay, that’s enough.  You get it? 

Your body language will change after you’ve had sex.  You will be relaxed.  You won’t be trying.  You won’t care.  You will be satisfied and confident and your body language will reflect that!  I once knew a guy who was very successful.  At times, I thought he was going to pass out or fall over he was so relaxed.  On that note, I have personally never met a guy who moved quickly and was high strung who was successful with women. 

So the next time you are out.  Practice this body language.  Drop your shoulders.  Relax your eyelids a bit.  Move slower. 

Here are some good examples of what you should be doing.

Hank Moody from Californication

One of my favorite guys out there, Cajun

So relax, relax, RELAAAAXX.   I recommend meditation and/or getting a good workout in before you go out.  (that is if you can’t get laid before)

And on the final note, if you can get laid/bj before, watch your success rate soar and send your thank yous to

Swagger Lee is a successful Orange County dating coach specializing in day game, relationship maintenance, and body language. 


Call:  714.955.3278


Dating Facts Jack!

Posted: September 20, 2012 in Attraction, dating, Seduction

Who doesn’t love a few fun facts?  Why else would that sugary beverage company Snapple still be in business?!  So I thought I’d share some of my favorites.  Enjoy.

FACT # 1.

If a man can’t decide what to wear on a date, he might want to wear blue. Studies show that women are attracted to men in blue

-It can help but don’t take this one with more than a grain of salt.  The most important things are body language, outlook, and personality. 

FACT # 2.

Psychologists at the University of Pennsylvania studied data from over 10,000 speed daters and found that most people make a decision regarding a person’s attraction within three seconds of meeting.

-This pretty much sums up how POWERFUL the factor of body language is!

FACT # 3.

Studies show that schools, colleges, coffee shops, and malls are all excellent places to flirt because people are more open to meeting others in these places. Poor locations are restaurants and movie theaters.

-Notice they didn’t say bars and clubs?  Stop overlooking all the opportunities you have every day!  Get social when you go out, no matter where. 

FACT # 4.

Studies show that before a man even speaks a word, the way he stands (whether he is slouching or not) counts for over 80% of woman’s first impression.

-Again, body language. 

FACT # 5.

Studies show that happiness is contagious and that potential dates find it hard to walk away from happy people. One of the biggest turn-offs during a date is negativity. 

-Bring that positive outlook and a strong sense of self.  Love yourself first.  Love yourself. 

For more facts and information on what I do, email me at



Swagger Lee

Men, learn to notice.

Women flirt differently to men.  They use subtlety.  They are masters at it.  Most men miss this because they are waiting until they are 100 percent sure she is into him.  Unless the woman is drunk, easy, or REALLY into you, she usually doesn’t give this 100 percent assuredness.  Here is a short list of some common things a woman will do/say when she is into you:


  1. Preening.  The more she plays with her hair, the more she is trying to look good for you.
  2. Make excuses to touch you (usually an arm touch during conversation)
  3. Her body language is positioned toward you
  4. Smiles at you then looks down
  5. Her overall level of responsiveness  ex:  if you tease her, she laughs, hits your arm, etc.


So start noticing.  It’s all in the details.  There is always a sub-communication happening in every interaction.  Plug into this, and you are speaking the language of women. 


Now, with these things in mind, I want to divert just a little.  When I talk to women, I assume she is into me.  I assume attraction.  That’s what you need to do.  Assume she is into you.  Most men who are naturally good with women have this mindset.  I just go into conversations with women, assume attraction, have fun, and am teasing and playful.  It’s that simple.  Yes it is helpful to me to be aware of these signs, but I don’t go into every conversation looking for them.  That is neediness.  I go into every conversation with a mentality that she is absolutely attracted to me.  Think about it.  What if this was indeed fact?  What if every girl you talked to was into you?   How would you speak?  What would you do differently?  Well, for one, I know I would be smiling A LOT.  I would be happy to interact with women.  I would be confident and walk tall.  I would be relaxed and fearless in approaching strangers.  Now, remember that guy you used to know in college that was amazing with women?  I bet he did all these things didn’t he?  Yes, yes he did.  And you should too.  I don’t care if you are fat, short, tall, skinny, muscular, whatever.  If you do this.  If you have this mindset.   You WILL be successful with women.  The challenge is attaining this mindset, but that’s what I do.  I help you get there.  I have helped many men and women get there, and you could be my next success story.  The pen is in your hands, write your life the way you want it. 


Swag on,

Swagger Lee


Greetings Swaggots.  Today I am posting a FREE snippet of my book HOW TO BE THE BEST MAN IN THE ROOM.  This book will revolutionize how you interact with people and teach you to lead the group.  Everyone knows that guy who seems to take over the room within an hour, that’s the objective here.  Enjoy.   




Meet Bob.  Bob is very excited to go out to parties and events to meet women.  He goes out with over-enthusiasm.  He goes out with intent.  For some reason, Bob can’t figure out why girls aren’t attracted to him and why he doesn’t have any respect.  Here’s why. 

Bob is needy.  People can feel this in his movements, tone of voice, and overall presence.  It comes off as desperate.  Just always remember this simple and yet counter-intuitive law of nature.  Those who have will receive more.  By truly believing you have everything you want, you will receive more. 

When you walk into a room, get into a head state of complete lack of care.  Be self-fulfilled.   Don’t care what anyone thinks of you.  Don’t say you love The Dixie Chicks just because the hot blonde says she does.  In fact, voice your opposition.  Not in an aggressive “I’m right, you’re wrong” kind of way, but in a simple and playful debate.  This maneuver alone can spark a lot of attraction especially in hotter women due to the fact that people don’t usually challenge her.  This leads to another principle and one you all know.  People love a challenge

Always challenge those who you oppose in opinion but in a light and fun way.  Never take things too seriously.  In fact, never take yourself too seriously.  If someone is getting very worked up during the debate, here is how you win.  Smile and say “Sure” and nothing more. 

Meet Bill.  Bill is dating a few girls and, needless to say, is completely satisfied with his sex life.  He goes to parties and events and just kind of slowly makes his way through the room with a genuine smile and a calm wit, which serves to make him very funny and a la very popular at the party. 

If you aren’t completely satisfied with your sex life, fake it til you make it.  It is through this combination of being content and yet flirtatious and sexual that you will receive the greatest results. 

For more information about Swagger Lee, email at:

or call at:  714-955-3278

-S. Lee

Two of My Favorite Openers

In a bar:  Phone opener.  Unless I can think of a good situational opener, I will usually use this.  I am posted casually next to a beautiful girl pretending not to notice her.  I check my phone and give a confused look.  I look around and pretend to see her next to me for the first time.  I tap her and show her a text with a “Hi ;)”  I tell her this chick is engaged and ask her for a quick opinion on what she thinks it means. 

TIP – Have a good and simple back story to follow up with.  Ex:  The “engaged woman” is a client and this is totally out of the blue.  I have never flirted with her.  She just texted me. 

WHY – This will make you look desired by another woman “social proof” and the girl you are showing the text to will eat it up.  They love fun drama like this.   It simultaneously creates mystery, social proof, and, with the proper body language/delivery, will successfully open almost ANY chick. 

SET UP – To set this one up, change a friends name on your phone to Tania or whatever and have them text you this.  


In line to order food/drink:  Situational opener.  Standing relaxed and leaning away from the girl I will look up at the menu and squint a little and look a bit lost.  Then, over my shoulder, I tell her I never really go here and ask her what is good.  She will tell me a few items and I will usually ask her what she is getting.

FUN TIP – This, for some reason works better the hotter the girl.  I will ask her which one she doesn’t like and tell her “Good, I’ll order that one.”  She will laugh and realize you are f*cking with her (a great way to flirt).

If you are any good conversationalist at all, this will work itself into good casual conversation effortlessly.  The trick is to start flirting and building sexual tension.  To do this I will usually touch her shoulder or arm in some way.  Ex:  My hand on her shoulder “Thank God you were here to help me, I would’ve probably ordered the ________ (whatever sounds the most unappealing).  For example, at Jamba Juice, it would have been the “Liver Bean Surprise.”

BUILDING SEXUAL TENSION – I will inquire about her and what she is up to and act impressed when she tells me.  This is me being impressed and becoming attracted to her the more I learn about her.  A great way to subtly qualify any girl and make yourself the prize to be won over.  After learning a few things, I will say something about how she is cute AND smart, adventurous, wise, etc. 

Both of these openers have been successfully executed countless times.  The trick is to already be in a talkative state.  A great tip before using these is to make small talk with as many people as possible.  I have been known to talk to the fat girl, the workers, the janitor, the old guy, ANYBODY.  You are essentially getting your state up to where it needs to be to effortlessly talk to an attractive woman. 

Good luck and swag on!

Swagger Lee


Email me for info about my services in the Orange County area.